Reinforcing my deep belief that little things matter, especially when it comes to words – Jeff Mowatt’s handy little guidebook, Influence with Ease, points out some really doable ideas to both help you influence others (positively, of course) and communicate better both at home and at work.
So whether you long to convince a crowd of hundreds that you have something important for them to hear or you are trying to convince your teenage daughter to clean her room, see if one or two of these ten tips can help you out:
- Use words that open doors –‘Maybe we should sit down and …’
- Avoid using the words meetings and scheduling – most people associate those words with time wasters.
- Mirror the non-verbal style of the other person (are they perky or subdued?).
- The quickest way to get someone’s attention is by using their name – it’s their ‘magic word.’
- Fewer words – often have more impact.
- To avoid sounding scatterbrained – start the conversation by telling the person the number of points you’ll make or the number of questions you’ll ask.
- Before you ask a question, explain why you are asking.
- To gain someone’s cooperation and put them in a position to ‘save the day,’ ask “I wonder if you might help me?’
- Create positive phrasing, like changing saying ‘I have to …’ to ‘I get to do …’ – this helps converts your burdens into blessings.
- And my favourite tip, if someone is doing something that is driving you crazy, like talking during a movie, try this, “Excuse me, I was wondering if I asked you really politely of you might …’ BRILLIANT!
Think about how honing your ability to influence could positively affect your relationships!