Tool of the Week
To sonder or not to sonder? I had never heard the word before, it's a neologism (newly coined word), so don't feel bad if you haven't heard of it either.
The Wiktionary definition - (psychology) sonder: the profound feeling of realizing that everyone, including strangers passing in the street, has a life as complex as one's own, which they are constantly living despite one's personal lack of awareness of it.
While we may well be the main characters in the movie of our lives, we are, at best, playing a supporting role or an extra in the lives of others. As self-absorbed as we are in our own orbits (even as adults) - the fact is that everyone else is that self-absorbed in their world.
We have the capacity to have enormous impact on others lives and not even realize it.
We judge people based on what we see at the moment (as they do us) but as a friend shared with me...
People aren’t born the minute you meet them, they have a whole life behind them.
Recognizing, remembering and/or acknowledging that they (and we) have unique histories, challenges, knowledge and experiences and that they may be having the best (or worst) day ever, may allow room for some compassion or empathy to slide in. They may be doing the best they can, given everything that life is throwing at them right now.
I see the high rise. I sonder. Thinking about all the different life stories going on behind the windows.
I hop on the bus. I sonder. I wonder whose family is jubilant and who is in crisis.
I go about my day. I sonder. Everyone is their own main character, I may just be a passerby in their life.
But at least I can give them a smile.
Happy sondering, Steph
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On the Nightstand
Slow Productivity The Lost Art of Accomplishment Without Burnout - Cal Newport - Key takeaways - do fewer things, do things at a natural pace, obsess over quality.
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In case you missed it, see if you have Brass Ovaries?
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Where in the world is Steph?
Had a hoot in Niagara Falls with Human Resource professionals and it means a lot when people take their time to put into words a public testimonial.
“I had the pleasure of attending Stephanie’s session at the OMHRA Conference, and it was nothing short of transformative. Stephanie has a rare gift for connecting with municipal HR professionals on a deeply authentic level. Her presentation, focused on reclaiming energy and balance in the face of competing priorities, was a powerful reminder that those who support others also need support themselves.
With high energy, practical insights, and a genuine passion for well-being in the workplace, Stephanie offered tools rooted in the Kaizen principle - small, intentional changes that lead to lasting impact. Her ability to blend empathy with actionable strategies left many of us feeling recharged, validated, and better equipped to face the everyday challenges of public sector HR.
Stephanie is not only a dynamic speaker but also a champion for sustainable success in HR. If you’re looking for someone who understands the human side of human resources - and can help you bring your best self to both work and home - I wholeheartedly recommend her!!” Anica Peter, CHRP, Human Resources Manager Municipality of Thames County
Aw, shucks!
Click reply and let's talk about working together!
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Have a coffee/tea chat with me
This month, Barry Lewis Green hits me up for a short interview. We talk about Surprises, Delights and Challenges and a whole lot more. A rich and enjoyable convo ensues in record time! Engage and enjoy.
Stephanie Staples
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